Yes, ive always been a strange one.

Journals. Thats what i had millions of. different sizes, shapes, colors, textures, but they were all journals. and in each journal, i had hundreds of stories, poems and songs. I had a butterfly one that contained all of my darkest stories. sometimes in the stories, the protagonists were being tortured and later killed because of their differences. A girl with red hair was forced to work in a brothel because of her Irish roots. People raided her Irish town and kidnapped all of the young girls and forced them into slavery. Nobody saved her, and she died from having her pelivs crushed. She bled to death. I must have been eight at the time i wrote that. I had always been a different kind of person. In kindergarden i got really pissed off when the substititute teacher i had a crush on started calling Karmen Shum "princess". i screamed at him one day, "She cant be a princess, She's Chinese!" of course, now i know better. i have all of these vivid memories coming at me at once. a girl named Cheyanne had a plastic false fishtank on her purple sweater that i was so jealous of. i used to play in the kitchen in the kindergarden class. i liked to play family the best, and i usually had a husband. I played with fuzzy felt food, and made delious meals that i later found out were not actually edible. Boys used to chase me with wooden tractors, and i would cry and pee on the carpet in fear. that stain in the Alexis Park library? oohyeah, that was me. i had to wear the teachers bathing suit for the rest of the day because i had peed all over my clothes. i had my first kiss from a boy named Bj, and afterwords he threw up on my foot. after that my lust was uncontainable. i would force boys to kiss me on the bus, and they would pull the emergency lever thing on the windows to freak me out so i would stop.
i had to deal with being hit with rakes, being hit with rocks, and being beaten up by a gaggle of boys just because i would sometimes chase them behind the portables to kiss them.
I remember once when i was being hit by rocks, a boy came and saved me. he chased them all away, and then he kissed me on the cheek. I told him he was my Knight in shining armour. He moved the next year. My list of crushes were long: Micheal Murrah, Tyler Selders, Jesse ?, Edwin Cruz, Lukas Rusak and the list goes on and on. Then in grade 5, i met my first love.
A.J Shook. I know the kid now, he's a totally grub. but back then he was so handsome. one night when we were having a campout, we slept right beside each other and cuddled all night. We danced together at the dance once, and he put his hand on my back. also, he used to chase me around the trees. and he threw his shoe at me. i knew i was in love, and i thought i was going to marry him. These feelings continued for him up to grade 8. and that was just the start of my tragically helpless-hopeless romantic childhood.